That night, was lonely.

My Story

24 April 2007

dedicated to the 2 spoilt brats who sit beside me in class: namely HC and Kenneth

*though i must admit tt HC has no part to play in this, Kenneth has set him up indirectly. after all, ONE FOR ALL, ALL FOR ONE. rite Kenneth.

heyy. this is counted as one post. retards..

oakyy. this is like super lame n retarded and REDUNDANT. lol. (:

-23:09-

15 April 2007

erm erm erm. feelings: kinda happy. no idea why. jus felt happy. though i have to say tt in the morning tt wasn't the case. i wanna give up on the Sec 3 soon to be exco. haii. i feel so disappointed in them. den do they know how many ppl are trying not to give up on them? i can't help but to say it's not impossible to do so la. in fact it's almost impossible to not give up on them. BUT the main issue is tt they are giving up on themselves or perhaps they're starting to be very complacent. haii. i wish them all the best. hopefully they know what they're doing. and lastly if you seriously know tt your attitude stinks, don't bother crying and saying you're too stressed. do you know how stressed i'm getting because of you alone. it all boils down to RESPONSIBILITY la babe eesh.

-01:56-

motivational talk was over like say 3 days ago? yupp. i shld tink so. quite interesting la. loved the closing ceremony. it's a pity mommy or daddy weren't there. overall. it was good yea? but after tt mayb i a bit slack still. haii. wonder when i'm finally gonna do up my life path to really know what i want to do in life. be a successful busness woman? HAH! i must belief in myself okayy? wateva. anyway. EXAMS are in at most 2 weeks time n i've got over 50 chapters to study among all the subjects. so scary. mid-year is so fast. i ought to more or less spend every waking hour studying in order to accomplish much. but i'm retarded so nope. i've only completed say 4 out of tt? haii. physics easier. i jus realised. i tot that chem was much easier. perhpas it's cos of the teacher? oh well. tt's probably excuses anyway. aiiya. i ought to ask ms lee to teach me many many stuff on mon. buck up vera!! jia you!! tmr i tink studying wit maine math ba. but never even confirm anything. aiiya. siann. scully not going again. crap only.. 2.02a.m now. so quiet. i studied only for a while den slack. i'm such a slacker. where's my determination n perserverance la? grr. hmm. i shall plan my whole wk from tis monday on.. errrrrrrrr. siann. forget it. i;m jus gonna go slp now. blah..

-01:56-

09 April 2007

oh my goooodddddnnnnnneeeeessssss. LOL! so drama-mama rite? hah. at least i like doing it. err. random? yupp. alrite. firstly! i would like to declare tt i'm so not sad or whatsoever in my previous posts la. serious.. i wonder why ppl thought that way..(goodness. ppl actually read my blog?) hahs. err. i ALMOST swear it's not emo or wat la. i'm jus airing my thoughts and tt is a nice form of relaxation if i may call it. weird huh? oh wells. what to do. secondly! aiiya. *smacks forehead* i still can't forget abt it. i'm sorry. many posts bout it alr but no details rite? who cares la. haha. hmm. i still think abt it. esp when i'm in ____ so it's pretty weird esp. err. but now not as bad alr. who knew tt time flew by so quickly and in a blink of an eye. wee~ time's jus gone. ehh. lemme think. it disturbs me somehow tt i can't get rid of it. but i doubt i wanna get rid of it either. <- notice why i've been unable to get rid of it? hahas. hmm. why do i keep punctuating my sentences with laughter. err. weird la i. wonder what's up wit me today.

let's finally start with TODAY! early morning. woke up by alarm clock. got up from bed. off my alarm clock. went to the toilet. washed my face. brushed my teeth. alrite alrite. jump str to when i reached sch which was only like 6.45. early can? wonder what time i'll arrive in sch when i finally step dwn from prefects. will i still arrive at the same time or what? nvm.. think abt it when i comes. did duty which is like patrolling the sec 1 area. annoying bloody freaking asses la. stupidity. just cos they're familiar with the school since they've been here for 4 months alr doesn't mean you guys can take over everything alrite? argghh.hmm. err. den patrol finish den sat dwn. national anthem. pledge. hymn singing led by stephanie w/o any music accompliment. cool seh~ ehh. HC are you ecstatic you heard her sing. s in original la. lol.. haha. hmm. jump jump. went MPR had motivational talk by the adam khoo grp. wahh.. hear all their experiences it was quite cool la. made me feel tt actually i'm quite lucky alr can. btw. I THINK THAT OPRAH WINFREY IS A SUPER COOL AND AMAZING WOMAN AND WE CAN ALL LEARN FROM HER FIGHTING SPIRIT!! LOL!!!!!!! but it's a fact la. can you imagine being born to a mother who's only 12 and abandons you? den you are adopted by some couple and your step-dad rapes you for like 12 years. den you make a change in your life and become one of the richest women in the WORLD!! it's amazing to be able to accomplish so much despite the environment that you're in. goodness la. from now on. i'm going to live my life mainly based on this

E + R = O
events + response = outcome

and the thing is that the events that you're in only affects like 10% of the whole outcome!! which means that 90% of the outcome is determined by your response. so like i WILL ensure that whatever response that i give is not something that i'll regret instead it'll be something tt benefits me and not the other party. so now i'm going to tell someone i like him. HAHAHA. you gotta be kidding. lol. alrite. tt was random again. errrr. i think the talk is super cool la. who knows. perhaps one day i'll be a motivational speaker too. haha. must have HIGH SELF-ESTEEM okay. haha. alrite. i feel that this post is getting more and more lame and random so i'd better get going. shall see what adam khoo, danny and candice have to say tmr. more laughter installed. (don't think of a blue elephant!<-immediately a blue elephant pops into your head!) haha. =))

love ya BABE. =)) smiles. alrite. i don't love ya. LA haha. see. i told you i feel super random todayy.

-22:11-

04 April 2007

i cross my fingers everyday. thinking about it constantly. whoops. i can't forget abt it. hahas. dy you're so disappointed in me aren't you? lol.. i'm superrrr sorry bout it. heh. heyy! but i don't think about it ask often alr though. lol..like maybe only how many times a day? a few times only. unlike tt time i always think abt it. den smile to myself rite?! haha. i'm so retarded..=) unfortunately i can't do what i used to do alr. because it's all different alr. ahh.. saddd.. nvm. i won't go b super retard n make myself paiseh or wat la. cos i'm so gonna learn from whoever PATIENCE and DETERMINATION. LOL!! haha. alrite. tt was lame. and kinda random. haii. kinda disappointed in myself oso ma. i expected myself to be much more. how do you put it? hmm. nvm. leave it blank. alrite. going off now. tmr still got NAFA test. hopefully i'll pass all my stations la. at least i passed my 2.4km today!! yay.. i tot i'll fail or smth. thank God for Thuraiya.. loves her. <3>

oh ya. btw SORRY TO THOSE TT I VERY KP TO TODAY!! cos really tired den you all keep annoying me. paiiseh..!!! dui bu qi ahh!! super sorry. promise i'll try not to let it happen again. paiisehh

could i stop thinking about IT? haii. i'm so saddddddd. stop myself from thinking bout it!!

btw. kenneth: if you read this. why was the previous post emo la? lame. i could almost swear it wasn't jus a bit err. dunno wat la.. =)

-22:04-

01 April 2007

it's all bloody lame. blahh. but DY! u'll be glad to know tt i've gotten over it alr la. i mean like though i dunno why u'll be glad but oh wells. cos i kinda xiang tong u noe. haha. becos i won't/can't/don't know how to make tings turn out the way they're supposed to. which is wat? i hv no idea. so i decided to get over it la. i mean what's the use of thinking abt it constantly when you know nth? Lol. oh wells dunno whether u believe tt i will/am/already hv gotten over it. i still feel like telling you. cos only u noe abt this whole ting mahh. hahas. =)) thx for it anyway.. hmm. when i go back. i'm gonna let tings go the way they are supposed to. cos i promised myself to give up n i shall. i love thiss.. i'm feeling super glad tt i got over it. otherwise it's hindering me in quite a no. of ways. haha. omgg. <333333>it constantly..

ytd headache was a total disaster. couldn't stop trying to bang my head against smth. i mean it was super pain la. i hv no idea how it came abt in the first place. sheesh. started since tuition.. when i went home. bathe and all. ate dinner den went to slp. slept for 12 hours. whoops. so long. made me feel like a pig. sheesh. LOL. den on fri nite oso slept for like 12 hours + cos mayb too tired/lazy. heh.. so in total i slept for 24 hours in 2 days. wasted like 2 days jus sleeping. bored bored bored. <- random. heh. hmm. i tink i shall go dwn to elias cc n make use of the study rm there la. so quiet so i tink the environment will be pretty conducive. hopefully anyway. err. SS test shld b like tis wk n i totally haven't start revising. i'd better go dwn there n start revising alr...... oh no... i'm so screwed. err. hopefully no other hw alr. argh. tinking abt it has made my headache come back. but slightly only la. unlike ytd. lol.. wonder wat's wrong wit me. blahh. alrite. gonna disappear alr.

sitting here and think and listening to what you indirectly said made me feel that perhaps it was all jus a phase that passed me by- n i'm glad for tt. THANK YOU LOADS FOR WHAT I THOUGHT WAS REAL BUT ENDED UP TO BE NTH BUT A PHASE!! =)) haha. i could jus say i love you for that.. (= <33

-14:07-